Mid year resolutions

the title is self-explanatory. and since i never keep my new year resolutions beyond two days (if that) either, i suppose it's indulging in the heights of optimism to think i might be able to keep these " puja resolutions"................

1. watch my calorie intake - fat chance, it's the festival of the celebrations of the return of the first family of gods, of course i'm gonna put on more weight

2. curb my spending habits - and throw away my last breath of freedom before the boards? i think not!

3. study more - ************blank silence************** [still depending on the power of osmosis]

4. start and finish the Great Indian Novel - eventually

5. be more oriental - learn the value and power of patience, humility and compassion. perfect the Pensive Grasshopper meditative stance while doing so.

6. try to start caring more about family (no matter how distant) beyond the immediate clan, and less about the perfect strangers who do the voices of the Simpsons.

7. set a deadline for myself to finish listening to all justin timberlake tracks since the 90's and then move on to sting (!)

8. come to a final decision regarding Life-After-The-Boards.....JNU or JU? home or hostel?

9. attempt to find the meaning of life. last date - next tuesday. (possibilities of answers - love, sorrow, magic, creativity, faith, or the number 42)

10. wean myself from the habit of either posting creepy stories, mindless verse, or cbse-formatted self-revelations in point form on this page.

it's going to be a long night tonight. sigh..........

<^_^>

Master, all is well in the state of Denmark

My exams are over. I am free.




(blubbers with joy and runs laughing hysterically around the outer wall seven sacred times)


now that that's over and done with, here is a short eulogy on freedom from oppression



food
how nourishing you are
healthier than exams you are by far
water
how cool you are
more refreshing than exams you are by far
sleep
how stupefying you are
more restful than exams you are by far
laughter
how stirring you are
more charismatic than exams you are by far
time
how short you are
speedier and crankier than an old car by far
life
how forgotten you are
lively and creative and happy no more
love
how ignored you are
more desperate and needier than ever before
exams
how despised you are
the most wearying, dreaded and hated by far

go simpsons.....up yours, mr.burns!

power drives men crazy. but sometimes the screenwriters behind them take this power-craze to a whole new dimension of ironic cruelty. for example, mr.burns, courtesy the simpsons. following are some classic lines from episodes over the long, money-hungry, power-mad years.....

Mr.Burns: Quick Smithers. Bring the mind eraser device!

Smithers:You mean the revolver, sir?

Mr.Burns: Precisely.

Mr. Burns: I'll keep it short and sweet -- Family. Religion. Friendship. These are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business.

Burns: Look at that pig. Stuffing his face with donuts on my time! That's right, keep eating...Little do you know you're drawing ever closer to the poison donut! [cackles evilly, then stops abruptly] There is a poison one, isn't there Smithers?

Smithers: Err...no, sir. I discussed this with our lawyers and they consider it murder.

Mr. Burns: I could crush him like an ant. But it would be too easy. No, revenge is a dish best served cold. I'll bide my time until ... Oh, what the hell. I'll just crush him like an ant.

Mr. Burns: I don't like being outdoors Smithers, for one thing, there's too many fat children.

Mr. Burns: Woah, slow down there maestro. There's a *New* Mexico?

Mr. Burns: What good is money if it can't inspire terror in your fellow man?

Mr. Burns: No one will want to kiss me after this, eh, Smithers?

Smithers: Well, it's their loss, sir.

Burns: I feel like such a free spirit, and I'm really enjoying this so-called...iced cream.

Smithers: Sir, in the spirit of the festival and everything, I'd just like to say that...[ahem]...I...love you.

Burns: Hmm? S

mithers: [quickly] In those colors! [aside] Oh, who am I kidding? The boathouse was the time!

Burns: The watchdog of public safety, is there any lower form of life?

Smithers: Don't worry sir, I rounded up our less gifted employees and led them into the basement.

Mr. Burns: Smithers I'm thinking about donating some money to the orphanage..when pigs fly!(Homer's bbq pig flies past the window)

Burns: Smithers, I've been thinking. Is it wrong to cheat to win a million-dollar bet?

Smithers: Yes, sir.

Burns: Let me rephrase that. Is it wrong if I cheat to win a million-dollar bet? Smithers: No, sir. Who would you like killed?

Mr.Burns: (To Homer)One more thing...You must find the Jade Monkey before the next full moon!

Smithers: Actually sir, we found the jade monkey. It was in your glove compartment.

Mr.Burns: And the road maps, and the driving gloves?!

Smithers: Yes, sir.Mr.Burns:Then its all falling into place!

Burns: I should've known you were the only one stupid enough to kidnap you! Now get down here so I can spank you in front of this gawking rabble. Smithers, take off my belt.

Smithers: With pleasure, sir!

Mr. Burns: Smithers there's a rocket in my pocket.

Mr. Burns: I'm looking for something in an attack dog. One who likes the sweet gamey tang of human flesh. Hmmm, why here's the fellow ... Wiry, fast, firm, proud buttocks. Reminds me of me.

Mr. Burns: A lifetime of working with nuclear power has left me with a healthy green glow... and left me as impotent as a Nevada boxing commissioner.

Mr. Burns: What are you doing man, that's Carl!

enjoy.........